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Wednesday, July 6, 2011

#187 Is Having All Three

Eyes half open
I survey the view
Nothing looks quite like it should
Everything is askew

But it's all ok
No need to feel dread
As soon as I wake up
I pad quietly from the bed

I chuckle to myself
As I make my morning rounds
A silly little saying
Runs through my head
Accompanied by strange sounds

"No wife, no horse, no mustache"

I can't begin to guess what it means
I didn't know when I first read it
And time hasn't made me any wiser
Especially at interpreting things it seems

Definitely have a wife
There she is sawing logs in the bed
Mostly covered with comforter
This woman that I wed

No horse, at least per se
I have a poodle
He's pretty big
As he ogles me from the foot of the bed

My mustache
Well, that finally came in
Took me into my twenties
But I finally grew more than wisps on my chin

So going by that silly saying
Perhaps I've arrived
Having wife, horse, and mustache
It wasn't easy but I survived

They need to extend that saying though
To include a multitude of kids
Enough stuff everywhere for my own episode of Hoarders
And in-laws living in my yard for the summer

And so it extends, into:
No wife, no horse, no mustache
No triple threat children
No epic consumer excess
No hobos in the yard

The thing of the original saying
I think was
That until you had those three things
You just hadn't arrived in life

Must have been a cowboy thing

I've arrived
Plus the kids
The stuff
And the in-laws in the yard