I soak through you
Fine Egyptian cotton
Now almost transparent
From hemmed edge to tattered bottom
Hugging your chest tightly
Nipples showing darkly through
Veiled assets of the milkmaid
Seemingly defying gravity too
It's the Thursday night
Wet T-shirt trampoline contest
When all the best sorority girls show up
To let the frat boys decide just who's tits are the best
"Don't forget to stay hydrated!"
I loudly proselytize
From my imaginary stage
Even as I'm sprayed about and atomized
I float all around the room
In cups of glass and Solo red
Chilling wine and spirits alike
Which will result in many an aching head
A couple smart and or boring ones
Depending upon your perspective
Drink nothing but me tonight
Being of that designated driver elective
You may say they are having no fun
But I beg to differ with you
For what could be better than being sixty percent water?
The answer would be adding a percent or two!
I'm your friend
I'm H two Ooh!
Say that with a smile and an open round mouth bitch
I'm big bad and one if your building blocks
When you're dehydrated
I'm the one you beg for to get your fix
Just ask for me by name
Best served in a long tall sweaty glass
Open the hatch toss me back
You know you want me inside of you
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