What a shameless fabrication
This joke that is worshiped
And called a 'vacation'
Why so, you ask?
Let me tell you
A road trip it was
To the stars and above
Followed by sun and sand
To be pampered and fanned
By sexy brown boys
While lying in the sun
What it was
Was a nightmare
What caused it was bugs
Nobody knows from where
They came up from the sea
And covered the land
As far as one could see
I saw a girl try to pet one
But then it took her hand
Now we are holed up here
Almost out of water
But we have plenty of beer
Six rifles and ammo
No change of clothes
But ten tarps of patterned camo
Our perch on this tower
Is precarious at best
We've coated the bars with oil
To keep the bugs away from our nest
I don't know how long we can hold out
Which is why I'm writing this
Stuffing it into a bottle
And throwing it into the sea
Perhaps when you read this
You'll come to our aid
There's four of us left here
Please send food, water and a helicopter
But most importantly
Don't forget a giant can of Raid
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