When I was Seven
In nineteen seventy eight
Peggy was the girl next door
My best friend
The same age as me
But wise for her years
We played ball together
We swung on swings together
We rode bikes together
We played house together
We got naked together
That last part all started one summer afternoon
It was hot on the grassy hill we were sitting on
With our backs to a giant oak
We were bored out of our minds
When she turned to me and asked
"Hey, do you wanna hump?"
I looked dumb and confused no doubt
And she rolled onto her stomach
She hunched her pelvis up and down on the grass
"You know, like this!"
I was bored and intrigued with the thought of something new
I said sure
And so started the seemingly endless times that we "got it on"
At least as much as two seven year olds can
She showed me oral sex
Which wasn't quite as it is as an adult
At the time the biggest concern we had with each other
Was that I didn't pee in her mouth
Nor her in mine
It was seven year old logic
She tried to get us to have sex too
Though erections were not predictable for me
When I had one
She'd wriggle it inside of her
When I didn't
She'd just slide around on my little limp weenie
Kissing was never anything we did
It seemed gross to me
Which is more seven year old logic
But that's fine because we were
We also never approached anything resembling an orgasm
We just did it for the laughs it seemed
Just doing each activity for a little while
Until the thought of doing something different popped into our heads
We got naked in the darndest places
Exploring each other's bodies
Under a tarp in the corner of my backyard
In the garage
In our car
In her basement
In the bushes in a clump of trees
And in the closet of my playroom
The second to last one there
Netted her a piece of beer bottle in her left buttcheek
Three stitches
And the telling of a no doubt strange lie to her mother
That last place
Got us caught
And brought an end to our fun and games
My mother opening the closet door
Catching us in flagrante delicto
With a look of shock and horror on her face
She yelled for us to put our clothes back on
And sent Peggy home
Leading to a long lecture from her later on
None of which I remember
Peggy and I stayed good friends
But it wasn't the same
We weren't really allowed to play alone anymore
And not long after all that
She moved away
Soon so did I
And life moved on
Now I don't know if any of that counted as having sex
Since I still didn't really know what that was
And it certainly didn't give me any good experience
For when I did actually consummate with someone when I was twenty one
I think of it now
As I did back then
For the most part
As Peggy's naked humping game
In nineteen seventy eight
Peggy was the girl next door
My best friend
The same age as me
But wise for her years
We played ball together
We swung on swings together
We rode bikes together
We played house together
We got naked together
That last part all started one summer afternoon
It was hot on the grassy hill we were sitting on
With our backs to a giant oak
We were bored out of our minds
When she turned to me and asked
"Hey, do you wanna hump?"
I looked dumb and confused no doubt
And she rolled onto her stomach
She hunched her pelvis up and down on the grass
"You know, like this!"
I was bored and intrigued with the thought of something new
I said sure
And so started the seemingly endless times that we "got it on"
At least as much as two seven year olds can
She showed me oral sex
Which wasn't quite as it is as an adult
At the time the biggest concern we had with each other
Was that I didn't pee in her mouth
Nor her in mine
It was seven year old logic
She tried to get us to have sex too
Though erections were not predictable for me
When I had one
She'd wriggle it inside of her
When I didn't
She'd just slide around on my little limp weenie
Kissing was never anything we did
It seemed gross to me
Which is more seven year old logic
But that's fine because we were
We also never approached anything resembling an orgasm
We just did it for the laughs it seemed
Just doing each activity for a little while
Until the thought of doing something different popped into our heads
We got naked in the darndest places
Exploring each other's bodies
Under a tarp in the corner of my backyard
In the garage
In our car
In her basement
In the bushes in a clump of trees
And in the closet of my playroom
The second to last one there
Netted her a piece of beer bottle in her left buttcheek
Three stitches
And the telling of a no doubt strange lie to her mother
That last place
Got us caught
And brought an end to our fun and games
My mother opening the closet door
Catching us in flagrante delicto
With a look of shock and horror on her face
She yelled for us to put our clothes back on
And sent Peggy home
Leading to a long lecture from her later on
None of which I remember
Peggy and I stayed good friends
But it wasn't the same
We weren't really allowed to play alone anymore
And not long after all that
She moved away
Soon so did I
And life moved on
Now I don't know if any of that counted as having sex
Since I still didn't really know what that was
And it certainly didn't give me any good experience
For when I did actually consummate with someone when I was twenty one
I think of it now
As I did back then
For the most part
As Peggy's naked humping game
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