Imaginary Friend

Say hello to my little friend
He's a fiend
Though he may be a she
I haven't checked as of yet
Sexing these things is a little strange

I'll draw you a picture
Here
It's a beach ball
It has nothing to do with the subject at hand
But now you have an original by me
Don't you feel special

But this thing here
This he she it thing
Well I can't define it
I can't confine it
I certainly can't stop it
From doing whatever it wants

Oh hell
There it goes again
It just pooped in the corner
Naughty!!!
I'd rub it's nose in it if I could find it
It's nose I mean
I think it's that thing there....?
Or is that it's elbow?

Ever changing in shape
Subtle in it's own existence
Bold in it's execution
I'm not convinced that it's real at all
What with the stares that I get
When I interact with it on the streets

Do you see it too?
Just nod your fucking head
Else there's no telling what I'll do
That's a good lad
Or is it lass?
Hang on
Hold still while I sex you