Door To Door Attack

Words fly like knives out of your mouth
A virtual Hong Kong Kung Fu flick in verbose excess
I duck and I dive
But I can't quite describe
The slashing that tore at my soul
Leaving punctures and gashes
Numerous open bleeding holes

Your middle name must be Ginsu
Only around because it's your day off
From going door to door with a case
Full of sharp gleaming knives
A rusty pipe and some old gnarly wood

Your demonstration is just the beginning
And you can tell you must be winning
Because I'm starting to waver
And go into deep shock

You press for the sale
Offering payment plans and extras
A case for the sharpener
A sexy certificate of authenticity
Imprinted with fabulous Japanese characters
That look suspiciously like Mickey and Minnie

Upon the floor covered in imaginary gore
Leftovers from the ferocity of your sales attack
I put up my hand
Which stops you cold
Not because of any authority
No

Between two fingers I offered my credit card to you