Erwin Schrodinger Was a Naughty Boy

"Erwin! Have you seen the cat?"
I try to hide my lie as I reply
"No mom, I have no idea where it's at"
All while waiting to see if the cat will die

Currently the cat is neither alive nor dead
At least according to this thought experiment
Though having actually set up the thing
I'm not sure where the 'thought' part went

The list was short and simple
One cat
One Geiger counter
One bit of radioactive substance
One length of wire
One electromechanical release
One hammer
One nail
One bit of wood
One sealed glass flask of hydrocyanic acid
One sealable steel box

Ok so the list isn't so short
Or so simple
But the whole thing is making me smile
I take a picture with the box and show my dimple

It's been almost an hour
No less no more
In a minute I'll open it up
I'll know the score

I'll lift the heavy lid and then I'll know
Will it be cat - 1 and acid - 0
Oh I can hardly wait
Or will acid be the hero

The cat is alive and dead
My mind is reeling
I might have a fever
I'm losing all feeling
On the edge of knowing
A precipice of thought
Though the cat is the one paying
For whatever the result has wrought

"Erwin! Did you put the cat in that box AGAIN?"
Oh crap, good thing the timers almost run out
"DING!" The bell jingles
I open the heavy lid to see who won this bout

And my face is laid open
By the cat on it's way by
Just as the geiger counter jumps
Letting the hammer fly

I let go the lid in the nick of time
Muffling the sound of the glass shattering
Keeping the poisonous gas inside
I wrap a rag on my bleeding cheek not looking forward to mother's nattering

Because for about the tenth time
I've done this experiment on her cat
Even though I've promised I'd stop
Leaving my research right where it is at

With the knowing that the cat is safer for me
When it's in the box unable to use it's claws on my head
Nice and safe or not
And both jolly alive and stiff as a board dead