#300 The Need To Fill A Hole

I've looked everywhere

I've done as you asked

I looked where you said

I've looked under rocks

I've looked under my bed

But he isn't there

Whenever I ask you where

Your face turns red

And you look away from me

It fills me with a sense of dread

I ask you if it's my fault

That he went away

You tell me no

That he just couldn't stay

You don't seem to understand

I have a hole

It's dark and empty

And it's inside my soul

But you refuse to see

I know you love me

I know that you care

But when I want to talk of him

Your eyes wander into a thousand yard stare

This is one mystery that just isn't fair

So I'm taking things into my own hands

I'm packing my bag

With all the essentials

Now it's almost too heavy to drag

I leave it behind

As I strike out at dawn

I'm going to a place

That I've only seen drawn

In his own hand

Many different images

That you hid in dark boxes

All marked simply "Cortez"

I don't know what that means either

You'll never tell me

Though it means something to you

I have eyes and can see

That same image

Drawn from different views

The cabin in the woods

Framed by a copse of yews

Upstate Maine is a long ways away

But I'm ten years old today

You said I'm a big boy

And I can find the way

As I cross the neighbor's field

Rough and bumpy from cultivation

I wipe the sweat from my eyes

And envision my goal with new determination

It will be
The best feeling I've ever had

When I knock on that cabin door

And can finally hug my Dad