If he shits on me one more time
I'll take this pen
And stab that hen
Pluck him
And stuff him
Cook him and eat him
In candle light
With a fine wine
Or perhaps I could reeducate the bird
Detain it without charges
Give it classes
With special glasses
You know
The ones that hold your eyelids open
No matter what is on the screen
Little brain taking it all in
Regardless of the screams
But that's cruel I suppose
You're right
I could just kill it
Take my rifle clip
And fill it
With specialized rounds
Developed for just such a fowl
I couldn't miss at this range
It will be a howl
Fine
I'll just move
You're such a party pooper
Over there to that table in the pavilion
I'd like to see a bird crap on me there
Wait what's all that hanging around
Oh man it's spiders
That's just super
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