Partners In Crime

Who would like to go a'murdering with me?
I'll let you help out
This is no one man crime spree

We need a division of labor
So as to perform at our best
With the FBI on our tails
Every little thing will be a test

All those insipids
Who say the same damn things
"Beautiful weather today"
Or
"Wet enough out for you, eh?"

Those are the ones I'll off first
Though I haven't decided on how to do it
But they have to go as they are the worst

Then the ones who always make the noises
Whether unconscious or not
The same pattern of grunts and groans come out of them
But then if you ask them to stop, all they say is "What?"

The guy that stands over me
While I fill out my paperwork
That's definitely the one I'll ice next
Or maybe the one that stands too close and tries to chat
Oh decisions, decisions, they have me so vexed!

But you can see the pattern here
Any old reason will do
Got in my space
Looked at me wrong
Same old reasons
Same old song

Let's brainstorm on getting rid of the bodies
I could use your input and thought
How best to do away with the evidence
With the high risk of getting caught?

I've seen some movies
Taken notes at some shows
I've cribbed pretty good ideas
I jot down what inspires me wherever I go

Well I'm sure we'll come to some arrangement and method
With help from a friend like you
I think I'm safe in saying
We'll get away with everything we do