Clickbait Yeti

There are fifty ways to leave your lover
But you won't believe how she left hers!

Lines are out everywhere that I look
Bobbers floating innocently on the surface
But each one armed with a hook
Destined to grab onto my brain
And pull me straight down
To view all the paid advertisements
Until I'm sure I will drown

Sometimes when I click to close
It won't even let me
Just popping up a dialogue box
Sent by the Clickbait Yeti
Who tries to reel you in
And not let you go
Asking with tearful yeti eyes
"Why do you hate me so?
Just click this link and find out!"

He never gives up it would seem
And so I click down the rabbit hole
Into a surreal type dream
Where nothing is ever what it seems
This link to the girl with the big breasts
Sends me to a college study
About which weight loss drug is best
And the inevitable attempt to sell it to me

Lengthen my penis!
Make millions from home!
Learn coding in my free time!
The Clickbait Yeti has endless tricks to play
Slopping the content into an endless feed trough
All making want to take the ultimate drastic action
Of walking away leaving the computer off

But I won't
Because secretly I want everything that Yeti has to offer

I WANT to make millions learning to code at home while lengthening my penis

All that, and more
And that Clickbait Yeti knows it