Needles and Pins

Too long have I lingered
Upon this magic water stool
This commode
This toilet-y throne of porcelain

Just one more page
It's what I told myself
And then just one more
Until I'd read a whole chapter
Maybe more
I'll never admit

Now I'm in trouble
I've got a dead piece of wood
It's stuck to the end of my right leg
Right where my foot used to be

I raise it up slightly
I set it back down
I bump it on the ground
Somewhat forcefully

No response
It might as well not be attached
So I finish my business
Cleaning up after myself

Then raise myself up by my left leg
And stand there
Ridiculously shaking my right
Like in the Hokey Pokey

Putting the right one in
And shaking it all about

Gradually it comes back to life
After the third day
Rolling that rock aside
Miraculously rising from the dead

What a relief
But that exclamation is premature
The consequences are not paid
Not yet
For sure

Pins and needles move in
Both tickling making me laugh
And torturing
Drawing a grimace

And not the kind that loves hamburgers

Laying on the couch
Right leg up in the air
Laughing and groaning

My cat looking on
His head cocked
Thinking what a fool I am