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Monday, June 24, 2013

ELS 3 - In Line For The Nun

Gum
That's what it was I decided
Adding just a hint of extra drag to my left shoe as I lifted it up with every step
And I paused at the bottom step
Scraping my shoe on the edge until a pink sticky mass came free
Then up and out of the subway
Into the warm humid air of the city above
Reminding me of it's oppresence in many ways

The smell
Wet garbage on concrete
A sickly sweet spoiled smell
With some cat piss mixed in for good measure

The sound
A constant din of people
Shuffling their feet
Crumpling their papers
Talking
Breathing

I saw the line almost right away
The arena wasn't far from the subway stop
And the line was snaking it's way down the sidewalk

I made for the end of the line
Three more people beating me there before I attached myself to the end

Up close and inside the comfort zone
That's why I hate queues
I'm better at the market
When there is usually a cart buffer between myself and the next body

I quickly covered my mouth and nose to stifle a sneeze
As the man in front of me was wearing too much cologne
So much so that I imagined he'd dipped his greasy rat's tail of a ponytail in the bottle of Drakar

I turned around
And was met with more body odor
And the smell of a garlic sandwich

It was coming from the woman behind me

A very attractive woman
With a very bad smell about her

I started to think that maybe I wouldn't want to wait in line for The Nun
When I looked far ahead
Towards the front of the line
And the towering old style marquee sign
That was currently bragging up tonight's fights

Above a doorway next to the main entrance
Sticking out at ninety degrees from the building
Was a smaller metal sign which might have said "Stage Entrance"
Though it was hard to tell with the piece of hand lettered cardboard hung over it:

"Check in here to fight The Nun"
It said, with a little arrow pointing down

I thankfully got out of line and headed forward
Happily seeing that this line was only four people long

A few people that had seen me step out of line started to grumble
So I tried to act like I was going somewhere else for their benefit
And was soon among people who hadn't seen me yet

At the very least
I could walk away with money for many late night long distance calls to Kazia, my lovely Tank Girl

At best
I could buy a ticket on the next steamship to the old country
With enough left over for a wedding and a small honeymoon

As I stepped into much shorter line
I smiled because I figured I had nothing to lose



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