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Wednesday, February 15, 2012

The Tire - pt 2: A Tale of the Wrench

My feet were dragging behind me
Eyes not focusing after a brutal blow to my head
Two burly policemen carrying me by my shoulders between them

I don't know where the hell we are
The van ride was dark, fast, and scary
All the while being yelled at in two languages
Mostly to shut up! And stop resisting
I swear I wasn't resisting
I just didn't know what they wanted me to do

Dragged from the van
Dragged across the parking lot
Dragged down a hallway
Dragged into a windowless room
Dropped on the floor
Like a sack of potatoes
I think I broke a tooth

I sort of crawled over to the wall and just sat there in the dark
Wondering what was next

I didn't have long to wait
The door burst open
Two police with rifles came in first
They both covered me while a third and fourth man came in
One carrying two folding chairs
The other a folding table

The chairs were set up facing each other in the center of the room
The table put between them

All the men backed out of the room
Watching me as they went
The last guard with a rifle gestured to one of the chairs
I think he wanted me in it

It did look more comfortable than the floor

So I sat and waited
The room seemed to get warmer
I was sweating
Maybe I was nervous
Yes, I definitely was nervous
I was happy nobody had killed me yet
But that didn't guarantee the future
And, oh yeah
Why had I been arrested?

Luckily someone let me know that presently
With the slow swing of the door
A smartly dressed man in a suit walked in
He had a folder in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other
He didn't offer me any though
As he sat down he asked me

"What were you going to do with the cocaine?"

I marveled at his clipped British accent
It was funny coming from his obviously Asian face
I kind of liked it

I didn't soak in the meaning of what he'd said for a few seconds

"Cocaine?"

I asked, belatedly

Very patiently he answered me

"In the tire
The tire that you were attempting to move
It was full of cocaine"

I honestly didn't know what to say
I wanted to tell him I wasn't moving it
That I had just been trying to figure out what it was doing there
And that I didn't know it was full of cocaine
And how the heck did he know there was cocaine in it
Was it some kind of a set up?

Once again, he helped me out in my dumbfounded silence

"We have been working with Interpol for two weeks
They advised us what was in that tire as it left Australia
We observed it being removed from the aircraft when it arrived
And we've been watching it ever since"

Yi!!!
I thought to myself
He knew what was going on!
Then I felt sad
And he didn't tell me

"You were advised not to go near the tire
Were you not?"

Oh right, Yi did tell me not to

"Your silence is rather damning, James
You need to give me some answers"

And that's exactly what I did
I told him everything
Everything I could think of about myself
And about everyone I knew
I even made up some people and things
Most of all
I told him how I didn't know a damn thing about that tire
And certainly not about any cocaine

The man in the smart suit didn't believe me
And he left
The four policemen came back
And performed their routine in reverse order

The first guy in gestured with his rifle for me to get off the chair
Rifles covered me
Chairs and table got folded up
Everyone left

They turned out the lights on me

Jesus jumping Christ on a rubber crutch
What the hell was I going to do here?

The next day
Or it felt like that long
The routine was repeated
I answered mostly as before
Though I may have added a few sins from my past life
It bored the man with the smart suit though

He left
An American Embassy officer came in
He had a shaved head and a worn black suit
I told him everything I'd told the man in the smart suit
I was absolutely terrified that I'd be thrown in a Hong Kong jail forever

Bald head and bad suit left after a reassuring pat on the shoulder

About ten minutes later I was escorted from the room
The bald head and bad suit was waiting outside the building
Standing next to the open rear door of his black Lincoln Continental
The little American flags on the fenders of that car were such a welcome sight

On the ride back to the airport
I was informed that while I had done nothing wrong
I was "uninvited" from Hong Kong
I must have looked confused

"That means you can't ever come back after I put you on your flight home"

Now that made me laugh

Because I never, ever, ever wanted to come back.

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