Pissed

The checkered pattern on the sectional sofa was six inches from my face
Consisting of a tight silky fiber
Where one block had the threads going North - South
And the next had them going East-West
Alternating to infinity

Or at least as far the couch went

My fingers rubbed on that softly alternating pattern obsessively
With my brain barely registering that it was happening
Up and down
Silky to rough
Rough to silky

This floor sure was dirty
Meaning that it was definitely a 5/5 type of clean
Which means the same thing as describing a car to be in 20/20 condition
As when it goes by at 20 mph and as seen from 20 feet away
It looks fabulous

This floor looked clean to me last night
But then I was seeing it from 5 foot tall eyeballs
And usually travelling at 5 mph

I shouldn't have had that last long island iced tea
Or the one before that
Or before that.....
I really don't know how far back that sequence goes

My head pounded
Squeezing my eyeballs in rhythm with the pounding
Pretty much a sympathetic vibration

I called out with slurred words
"Legs!
Get up!
I have to pee!"

But the legs would have none of that
At least not yet

So I laid there on the linoleum floor
With one eyeball level with the gap under the couch
Staring through the accumulated crumbs and dust bunnies
A stray red twist tie from long forgotten bread

Past all of that
At the brown baseboard behind the couch
A small grey mouse sat stock still
Small eyes catching the light just so
Glowing like little reflectors on the side of the road

With whiskers twitching slightly
He watched me silently

As I pissed myself