One Dime Bag Please

"Come in with me, would you?"

I looked at her nervously
I didn't know this guy
I didn't really want to go inside
All my young life I'd heard about drug dealers
They were dirty criminals
As likely to kill you as to sell you what you ask for

Or so my father said

"C'mon, please? I had a shit time a few months ago"

"What do you mean?" I asked

She looked down at the dirty floor of the Chrysler
Her face turned a little red
Without looking at me she told me

"I went to this guy's place on the other side of town
Over by the south side Meijers store
In that subsidized housing area
I was looking for a dime bag of weed

I had a hard time finding his place
All the buildings looked the same
After about fifteen minutes of cruising around
I found his door number
It was hard to tell because one of the numbers had fallen off
But you could still see it's outline in the brick

The place looked creepy
I shouldn't have gone in

As I walked up the short cracked uneven sidewalk
He opened the door
Eying me up and down
And asked if he could help me"

At that
She bit her full lower lip
And crossed her arms tightly over her breasts
Still not looking at me she went on

"I said a friend said he had some pot
He asked if I was a cop
I said
'No of course not'
And he had me wait in the front kitchen
While he went into the back for a minute

When he came back out he had the dime bag for me
And a little glass pipe with a couple little white things inside
He puts the bag on the table and offers me the pipe
'Here, it's something new I got, give it a try'

I didn't want to be a puss
So I fired it up with the lighter on the table
Cooking it for a few seconds
Then taking a big hit off it"

T turned to me at that point
Her eyes big and wet

"I felt like I wasn't in my body anymore
It was the most fucked up feeling ever
I had no sense of time or anything
Next thing I knew
I was on the floor on my back
My shorts were off
My shirt was pulled up
And this dude was fucking me

And I didn't care
I barely felt it even

He bit my tit so hard it bled
But I didn't feel that either
It didn't feel good
It didn't feel bad
I wasn't really there"

Suddenly she pulled up her shirt
Showing me her breasts
Those same breasts I'd been dreaming of seeing

But not like this
Not in this context

She touched a spot just above her left nipple
There were two quarter inch scars close together

"Right there
That's where the asshole bit me
I might not have felt it when it happened
But I sure did later"

She pulled her shirt down again
Her cheeks flushed
She looked at the floor again
Abruptly conscious of what she'd shown me

"He came in me
Got up and pulled up his pants
Sat down at the table and smoked
Watching me

And I just lay there
My head was up in the clouds
And I knew what he'd done
But I didn't care
I still didn't feel it
I just felt good
I felt high"

She started crying then
So I held her as she sobbed

"It was so fucked up
I worried I was pregnant the whole month
Who does that to people???"

We stayed like that for a little while
Sitting in the gravel driveway
In the green Chrysler
Outside Crazy Mikey's house
Who was supposed to sell us a dime bag

Nobody bothered us
Nobody really noticed us

Finally she looked at me again
Wiping her face with her forearm

"So could you go in with me? Please?"

Of course I said yes
I loved her
And she needed someone to have her back