Captain Normalhate

I learned to stop being a shill for the man
And delight in the comfort of my tinfoil hat

Those chemtrails that I insisted were not real
Well I lied
Because they so were
I helped fill the chemical hoppers myself
Or so I was told
I must have forgotten it all like a foggy faced dream
Because
Chemicals

There was a man on the grassy knoll that day in Dallas
Who aimed so carefully at Kennedy's face
I know because it was me
With my steady hands and Marlboro Man mouth
Pulling the trigger was as easy as falling out of bed
Easier perhaps
Because
Conspiracy

Obama was born in Kenya that summer of '61
We raised him up to be a Muslim sleeper
And I hear when nobody is looking he prays to Mecca
I know this because I was one of the ex-Nazis who made it happen
Revenge upon America for defeating us
Hatched in our secret base under Antarctica
Where we are all blonde haired and blue eyed
Because
Birthers and fundamental Christians, and stuff

I signed this huge document saying that all of it was so
And that I'd just simply forgotten it all
Because
Chemicals (remember?)

Now I'm happy in my little cell
With an hour of time in the yard
And an endless supply of Reynolds brand Aluminum Foil

I have a new tinfoil hat every single day!