Here There Be Monsters

Sometimes
When I remember certain things
I am transported to that moment

It's like I've dressed up in the skin of a monster
With no control over my limbs
Words that I don't want to utter
Come tumbling from my lips

I close my eyes tightly
I wish those times away

"It was a long time ago
You are not that person anymore
It doesn't matter
Don't look back"

Is a mantra I repeat
To try and keep these things at bay
Though it doesn't help very much
And I have to say it several times a day

Sometimes
I see a kind of faraway
Haunted look in someone's eyes

Like their minds are leading them somewhere too
Somewhere secret
Somewhere full of rage and shame

And maybe it should make me feel better that I'm not the only one

But it doesn't

As I'm still the secret monster in your midst