#226 Chewing Lulu

Lulu loved gum

She chewed it all the time

She chewed on it in school

She chewed on it at church

She chewed on it at home

When she slept

She tucked it between her lip and gum

“Like a cowboy” She was wont to say

Her mother told her she shouldn’t

Her father told her not to swallow it

And if she did it would stay in her stomach for life

Her Teacher said that you are what you eat

Her Sister said “Gross!!”

Lulu chewed her gum

And when she was done

She would always

Every time

Never forgot

And always enjoyed

Swallowing her gum

When Lulu was sixteen

She chewed

Ten pieces

Of Grape Hubba Bubba

She loved how it smelled

She dreamed

Of being a huge

Purple

Lulu sized piece of grape bubble gum

Of course

She swallowed every piece

And you are what you eat

When she woke up the next day

And went out to play

A 100 foot giant came by

And picked her up

Popped her in his mouth

And chewed her

Blew a bubble

And smiled

Because Lulu

Tasted just like

Grape Hubba Bubba

#225 In 1984

In 1984

It was days of  yore

Of plenty

And innocence to spare

I was learning

To use my Retina camera

Make model rockets

And how to refinish a boat

I was in big trouble

For throwing stones at the window

But the window was broken

Actually it was cellophane

And it wasn’t stones

It was wood chips

So actually:

Throwing wood chips at the cellophane

“Get out of my sight” She said to that

I was into Men At Work

Van Halen was the bomb

I was a mix tape fool

I made them for fun

Using my patch cords

Listening to them on my walkman

Then recording them over

I mowed the grass

Enjoying the sweet  smell

Of Lawn Boy two stroke mix

Clipping and trimming with hand clippers

Wearing my shoes out on the East Lansing lawn

I had birth control glasses

Anything cooler was automatically vetoed

My mother dressed me

I couldn’t leave home unless she approved

I dreamed of owning a Ferrari someday

Though I had no means to pay

Hitching rides from my friends brother

Was as close as I could come

In 1984

I glued the lock on Mr. Ball’s classroom door

I lied to his face when he confronted me

His braces clad teeth gritted

I continued my habit

Of falling out my chair during class

Making a racket on the floor

I thought it was funny

In 1984

Much the same as today

I didn’t know what I want to do when I grow up

But I was going into the eighth grade

I was king of our school

High school was still a lifetime away

#224 Used Toy For Sale

Rummaging around for a deal

At the second hand store

Hoping for something good

As most things there were such a bore

As I was thinking on giving up

I spied something strange

It looked like......no it couldn't be

And old Hitachi Magic Wand

I know the box says

"To relieve muscle tension"

But we all know what it is really for

And it plugs into the wall

No battery changes required

This one was old though

Yellowed and dusty

I was afraid to touch it

As I knew what it's life

Most likely had been like

To I bent near

Just to satisfy my curiosity

And I almost wished I hadn't

Upon it's vinyl head

There was a light crust

Sort of like dried boogers

I suspected what it was

And certainly was NOT

Turned on in the least

I piled the things back on top of it

To hide it from innocent eyes

And wandered back outside

Wondering the type of person

Who donates their old unclean sex toy

And almost as an afterthought

The type of person who would buy it

#223 Is an Innocent Question

All the miles

Yet so many smiles

Lie between us

I can't help but wonder

What do you taste like?

Are your lips soft and moist

Tasting of fruit or mint

Your tongue so silky smooth

Twined with my own

And suiting the mood

Your skin

Baby soft to the touch

I trace your curves

I'm hoping you don't mind much

The curve of your jaw

The hollow of your neck

I can scarcely resist

And I give your skin a peck

But I linger there

And draw my mouth lower

Dragging my tongue

"Too quick!", you say

So I go slower

Between your breasts

You smell clean and nice

Your skin tastes like apples

So sweet I lick you thrice

I say hello to each nipple in turn

Grinning as they crinkle and grow firm

I'd love to linger

But with a flick of my tongue

I am gone

Running hands on your sides

Finding the tickle spot

That we all seem to have

Resting them on your hips

I move each leg to the side

Spreading you wide

Kneeling before you

I worship your body

Smelling your scent

I delve a little closer

I look up and see you

Looking down at me there

I kiss you below your belly button

And stop to stare

You open before me

Your form so lovely

Wetness gleaming

Upon the petals of your flower

I want this dream to go on

I wish to linger

I want to hear you moan

As I dip a finger

I want an answer to my question

What do you taste like?

#222 Den of the Mole Men

I dreamt of earthquakes last night

And when I awoke

I had quite a fright

All around was dim and grey

Out on my front porch I went

Looking around for clues

As to what had happened

When I spied two crews

They were working together

To patch the large hole

That apparently my house had made

As it crashed down through the coal

I was underground

That much was plain

Though how deep

There was no telling

I called over one of the workers

Hoping he could explain

As he waddled over

I was pretty shocked

For he was more mole than man

And that was just for a start

On his head he wore a yellow work hat

His face, was really mole-like I swear

Squinty eyes, grey complexion

A long nose with little pink tendrils on the end

For the rest, I cannot say

For he was wearing a pair of jeans and a shirt of chambray

We conversed for a bit

He explained what had happened

They’d been doing some ‘altitude digging”

And my house has fallen through the weakened ground

He was very sorry

But no good solution was to be found

The house, could not go back up

And now that I’d seen them

Neither could I

Which was pretty brutal

I won’t lie

Thinking I could always get away later

I asked what was to be done with me

Since I was staying

Were they planning on eating me?

I asked, with no small amount of praying

He laughed a little mole man laugh

And told me not to worry

They never ate meat

Rather, some kind of a vegetable slurry

Going on

He told me of others

Who had been here awhile

They were only a few days away

By way of their tunnels

And were set up in style

I’d be allowed to pack up my favorite things

To be sent along with me
Which did pique my interest
Not so much my stuff

But the nature of my future company

I picked out some clothes

And some snacks for the road

With my mole man accompanying

We set off with my load

I wondered who else was here

Would they be kind?

What was in store?

Not knowing what I might find

I looked at the mole man and smiled

He looked back and sneezed

I took that as a good sign

So I whistled a tune

As we marched off into the dark

#221 Juggling for a Living

Flying up in the air

Weightless for a second or less

Most things don't notice

Other things can make a mess

The kittens I was juggling

For that kids birthday party

Two out of the three

Totally peed on me

The eggs were another thing

I was going for a record

Three, four, five, six and more

I thought I had it licked

But then there was yolk on the floor

Hatchets

Those were a mistake

I can admit that now

Let me count the ways

I can only get to eight

As that's all the fingers I have these days

One of the hardest things I juggled

Was women

There was this time I was dating three

Not one knew the other

Until I mixed up their valentines

Suddenly I was dating nobody

And I got beat up by one's brother

Juggling can be a challenge

It's true

And as long as I keep doing it

I'll keep pushing it

Finding new and unusual things

To throw up in the air

One after the other

As long as I can

Until I can't

#220 Puddle Everlasting

The puddle

It's always been there

Looking back at me

Whenever I look down

Mocking my feeble attempts

At containing it

Restraining it

Preventing it

When I fill it in

It washes out

When I pave it over

It sinks lower

And forms again

And again

I'm slowly losing patience

And I'm getting creative

I'm putting down stakes

Marking the area

Then I'll dig it out

It won't know what to do

If I move it by the cubic

Stupid puddle

It can't beat me

Now it's gone

The truck took it away

One year ago today

A block of soil, pavement and stone

10 yards square

2 yards thick

They said it was the most interesting move

They've ever done

Now when it rains

The area is smooth

There isn't a ripple

Let alone a puddle

To be seen

Sometimes I walk out there

And look around after the rain

Mostly satisfied

But a very small part of me

Misses my lost puddle